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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28511049">you'll wait for me only (scared of the lonely)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahcakes613/pseuds/sarahcakes613'>sarahcakes613</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Law &amp; Order: SVU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cunnilingus, Exhibitionism, F/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Threesome - F/M/M, Vaginal Sex, Voyeurism, safe sex, this exists almost entirely for spite</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:13:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,281</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28511049</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahcakes613/pseuds/sarahcakes613</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Amanda and Hasim's date night is interrupted when Declan shows up. They decide not to let it stop them.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Declan Murphy/Amanda Rollins, Declan Murphy/Amanda Rollins/Hasim Khaldun, Hasim Khaldun/Amanda Rollins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>you'll wait for me only (scared of the lonely)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm in a minority here, but I fully shipped Declan and Rollins. I also fully ship her with Hasim, and even though we all know why it won't, I wish the canon would go in that direction. In the meantime, have some smut.</p><p>This is the first time I've ever written a het threesome. Actually, it's only my third time writing het smut in general, so. Enjoy?</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Amanda is just straddling Hasim, pushing him down into the couch, his hands hot against her back, when there is a knock at the door.</p><p>She groans, head lowering to mumble into his shoulder. "Can we just pretend no one's home?"</p><p>He nudges her up with an understanding grin. "As much as I like where you are right now, you should probably answer that."</p><p>She grimaces and pushes herself off his lap. He adjusts himself, not bothering to be discreet about the way his erection is making itself known against the front of his jeans.</p><p>She looks at it, then up at him, with fire in her eyes, which quickly turns into an eye roll as the knock repeats, slightly more insistent this time.</p><p>"I'm comin', hold your horses," she calls out as she walks towards the door. She tugs at her shirt as she moves, straightening the collar so it doesn't look like someone has been pulling at it to get at her collarbone, which is in fact exactly where Hasim's mouth had been only moments ago.</p><p>She brings her face up to look through the circle of the door's peephole and then jumps back, heart pounding.</p><p>Hasim stands up from the couch, his brow furrowed in concern. He points silently, questioningly, towards the table where he has abandoned his coat and his service weapon.</p><p>She shakes her head and takes a deep breath before wrenching the door open just as the man outside lifts his hand to knock again.</p><p>"Hey, darlin'," he says. "Surprise."</p><p>Declan Murphy stands there, a rucksack slung over one shoulder. He smiles at her, but it's small and nervous, like he knows he might not be welcome.</p><p>She doesn't say anything right away, and they stand there silently on either side of the door for a beat before she stands back.</p><p>"I guess you should come in," she says. She is looking down at the floor, at his feet in their worn-out boots. As he slides past her she risks a glance up, eyes gliding away as his gaze steadily meets hers.</p><p>"Howdy," Declan waves to Hasim, who nods a slow greeting.</p><p>He sets his bag down and looks around expectantly. "Is Jesse awake?" He asks hopefully.</p><p>As a result of his long stints of undercover work, his interactions with his daughter have largely been virtual, Facetime chats and video messages on birthdays, along with regular deposits into a savings account Amanda pretends not to know about.</p><p>"She's at her Grandma Betty's for the night." Amanda says.</p><p>He tilts his head. "Your mom decide Beth wasn't granny-sounding enough?"</p><p>She snorts. "Betty is Al's mom. She takes Billie and Jesse a couple times a month."</p><p>He nods. The three of them stand awkwardly until Hasim leans forward, hand extended. “You must be Murphy,” he says. “Hasim Khaldun, it’s nice to meet you.”</p><p>“Uh huh,” Murphy says, shaking his hand with some reluctance. “You with the force?”</p><p>“Hasim’s with Transit,” Amanda interjects. “We met on a case last year.”</p><p>“A cave cop?” He arches an eyebrow. “I didn’t know you guys were allowed above ground.”</p><p>Amanda frowns but Hasim laughs. “Only after sundown.”</p><p>Declan cracks a grin and just like that, the tension is broken.</p><p>“Can I get a drink?” Declan asks Amanda, and she waves to the kitchen.</p><p>“You know where things are,” she says.</p><p>She nudges Hasim to sit back down on the couch while Declan is rummaging, glass clinking as he finds the beer she keeps tucked at the back of the fridge.</p><p>“So,” Hasim says mildly. “That’s Jesse’s father.”</p><p>She sighs. “Yep.”</p><p>“Did you know he was in town?”</p><p>Another sigh. “Nope.”</p><p>“You need me to go?”</p><p>Amanda bites her lip and looks up at him through her eyelashes. “I guess date night’s kinda ruined, huh?”</p><p>He wraps an arm around her, bringing her in to kiss the top of her head. “Not if you don’t want it to be.”</p><p>Declan returns, and sits down in the armchair, saluting them with his beer. It’s quiet while he takes his first few sips, and then he sets it down on the table, on top of one of the decoupage coasters Jesse had made for her in school last Mother’s Day.</p><p>She wants to ask how long he’s back in New York for this time but doesn’t, because she’s not sure which end of the time spectrum she wants to hear. Instead she settles for picking at the label of her beer bottle.</p><p>Hasim’s hand covers hers, brings her hand up to kiss the palm. He gives her a smile and she returns it. It’s one of the things she likes so much about him, his easy smile, how quick he is to reassure her, like he can sense when she needs it.</p><p>Declan watches them.</p><p>“You remember that poolhall we went to one time, the one with the bartender?” He asks it casually, but Amanda’s shoulders tense.</p><p>“Yeah,” she says, eyeing him warily.</p><p>He picks up his bottle, tilting it towards Hasim. “Reminds me a bit of him,” he says, taking a swig. His head tilts back and his throat works.</p><p>Amanda can feel her cheeks flush as she thinks about what he's saying. It had been a wild night, borne of too much whiskey and not enough common sense, but she and Declan had wound up going home with a bartender who swung both ways and was incredibly flexible in doing so.</p><p>She lifts her bottle to her lips, feeling like she isn't nearly sober enough for the decision he's laying out before her.</p><p>Hasim looks back and forth between them. “Should I be insulted or flattered?” He asks.</p><p>“Well, I suppose that depends how open-minded you are,” Declan grins, baring his teeth.</p>
<hr/><p>Very open-minded, it turns out.</p><p>She’s not entirely sure how or when it happened, but they are all in her bedroom now, lights on dim and all the attention on her.</p><p>“You’re so beautiful, ‘Manda,” Declan whispers, coming up behind her. He kisses the back of her neck, down her shoulder, his beard bristling against the skin as he pulls her open shirt down and off her arms. “Christ, I’d almost forgotten how beautiful you are.”</p><p>Hasim is seated on the bed, back against the headboard. His shirt is off and his pants are unbuttoned, his cloth-covered bulge rising up from the open fly of his jeans.</p><p>She turns as her shirt falls to the ground, pulling at the buttons of Declan’s, tugging it over his head, along with his undershirt.</p><p>Much like his beard, his chest hair is starting to lighten, ruddy brown turning to grey. She twines her fingers through it and drags them down his belly to cup his crotch. He bucks into her grip and pulls her tighter against him, his hardness pressing against her core.</p><p>“What do you want, darlin’?” He asks.</p><p>She looks over her shoulder, her eyes meeting Hasim’s. He’s gazing steadily back at her, waiting for her to make a decision.</p><p>“I want you to watch me ride him,” she whispers in Declan’s ear. “And then when he’s finished, maybe I’ll let you in too.”</p><p>His hips buck again and he groans. She pushes him down onto a chair that is usually covered in laundry, perches herself on one thick thigh. She grinds herself slowly against him, using his shoulders for balance. He wraps an arm around her, pulling her down to kiss her throat, her collarbone, to brush his beard between her breasts, his lips and tongue following.</p><p>Hasim comes up behind her, unhooking her bra and easing the straps down. She leans back against him and Declan moves with her, burying his face in her cleavage. His hands comes up to cup her breasts, thumbs flicking over her nipples.</p><p>She gasps as Hasim leans over to kiss her, swallowing her moan, his tongue sliding against hers as Declan’s slides down her breast.</p><p>Hasim’s hand slides down her stomach, flicks open her jeans, his fingers tripping lightly along the waistband of her panties.</p><p>“Come to bed,” he murmurs into her ear. She shivers at the heat of his breath.</p><p>Standing on shaky legs, she allows Declan to tug her jeans down, to gently draw down her panties for her to step out of. He gazes up at her and her breath seizes at the warm affection in his eyes before he drags his eyes down to her core.</p><p>She’s wet, her pussy lips slick with arousal and he looks back up at her, holding eye contact as he puts his mouth on her</p><p>She’s bare but for a landing strip of hair and he follows it with his tongue, down from her pubic mound to her clit, just peeking out from under the hood. She whimpers as he lightly sucks on it before pulling away. His beard is damp when he sits back and he doesn’t bother to wipe it, licking his lips.</p><p>Hasim strips the rest of his clothes off and drops onto the bed with a bounce. He pulls at the pillows so he can lie flat and he reaches over to her nightstand to pull a condom out of the drawer.</p><p>Amanda hears Declan suck in his breath at that, at the realization that Hasim’s spent enough time in her bedroom that he is comfortable with helping himself to her condom stash.</p><p>She crawls up Hasim’s body, her hair swinging around her face, brushing against his chest. She leans down to kiss him, his mouth open under hers, soft lips pliant and tongues twining together. He pushes her hair back, tucking it behind her ear so Declan’s view is unimpeded.</p><p>He pulls her up, guiding her to hold onto the headboard as he tilts his face up to taste her, sucking her labia into his mouth, laving his tongue over where Declan’s had been. She grinds against his face, his nose pressing perfectly against her clit.</p><p>“Oh god,” she pants as she grinds in tight circles, his tongue pointed as it flicks up against her clit. “Fuck yes, I’m – “ Her grip on the headboard tightens as she comes, bucking her hips against Hasim.</p><p>He gropes for the condom, ripping it open and rolling it onto his cock, holding himself steady as he pulls her down, desperate to sink into her heat.</p><p>“Wait,” Declan’s voice is raspy. “Turn around, darlin’, let me see you.”</p><p>She balances herself on Hasim’s hands as she turns and looks straight at Declan. She rises up and Hasim guides her down finally, holding her hips as she slowly sinks down onto him. Her eyes flutter closed as she settles, her ass flush against his thighs.</p><p>His cock is long and slim, with a wicked curve to it that pierces her core, perfectly hitting that spot she can never reach inside herself.</p><p>“God, you feel so good,” Hasim moans as she begins to rock her hips. “Keep going, sweetheart. Ride me, show us how you like it.”</p><p>Her skin tingles at the ‘<em>us</em>’ and she opens her eyes to look at Declan, who’s shimmied his pants part-way down his thighs. His cock sits heavy against his stomach, the tip pearling up with precome.</p><p> His steady gaze pierces her as deeply as Hasim’s cock, heated and wanting. His hands are clenched in fists on his thighs and she runs her own hands down her body to her thighs, scratching at them lightly.</p><p>He imitates her movement, large hands moving down his thighs. She scratches again, slightly sharper, and he imitates her again, scratching at his own skin, hissing at the sting of it. She holds his gaze as she raises a hand to her breast, pinching a nipple. She tilts her chin in a challenge at him and he repeats it, his breath hitching as he pinches his own nipple. She can see his cock jump and his other hand twitches.</p><p>“Touch yourself,” she says.</p><p>He wraps his hand around his cock and strokes it slowly, matching her pace as she rises up and back down. Every time she swivels her hips, he twists his wrist.</p><p>Hasim’s hands runs up her back, caressing her skin. He palms her ass, parting her cheeks as she moves up to watch his cock disappear into her cunt.</p><p>She’s not used to the slowness of this type of fucking, the last time she and Declan had done this he’d been more directly involved. He’s watching her now, watching her put on a show for him, putting on a show in return.</p><p>She begins moving faster as heat builds inside her again, fucking herself down hard as Hasim thrusts his hips up to meet her, skin slapping against skin.</p><p>“Come on,” Hasim urges, “take your pleasure, sweetheart.”</p><p>She throws her head back as she bucks harder, his cock nudging against her G-spot, his hand coming around to rub at her clit. She’s caught in the middle, balancing on the edge of something until the dry pad of his finger catches on her slick-soft skin and that tiny spark of roughness sends her hurtling over the edge and she climaxes with a soft cry. Her thighs tremble as her hips continue to thrust as she comes down.</p><p>She’s so wet now she can hear it, the slapping sound of Hasim thrusting inside her, and she clenches, tightening her hold on his cock. He cries something out in another language, his hands heavy and gripping tight around her waist as he holds her in place while he comes.</p><p>She imagines she can feel the heat of it even through the latex barrier and as his cock begins to soften and slip out of her. His hands on her waist keep her from slumping over and he braces himself, sitting up so she is can lean back against his chest.</p><p>Hasim shifts his legs apart, widening hers at the same time. As he moves, his cock slides out, and she clenches again, feeling a sudden emptiness inside her.</p><p>Hasim looks over her shoulder at Declan, who’s got his hand wrapped around the crown of his cock, the tip leaking and spilling pre over his fingers. Hasim’s hand dips down to her lips, spreading them to show Declan how wet and loose with arousal she is.</p><p>She can feel it throbbing, can feel how swollen her clit is and how open her cunt is, and she wants more. She reaches out for him and he leaps to his feet, shuffling out of his jeans as he moves towards the bed.</p><p>“How do you want me?” He asks, his voice almost hoarse. She thinks about it and then nudges Hasim to lie back down, swinging a leg over, turning and straddling him again so they are face-to-face. Her hands are flat on the bed at either side of his head and he gazes up at her with something so akin to adoration that she twists her head to let her hair fall down over her eyes. Even so, she can feel the warmth of it, and it sends a flush down her body.</p><p>Declan’s hand is stroking her ass, thick fingers trailing down to gently stroke her opening. He dips one, then two in, fucking up into her slowly, letting her adjust to the spread of them. She tightens around them and he groans.</p><p>“God, darlin’, I want to be inside you. Please?”</p><p>She can feel the damp tip of his cock nudging against her. She knows he’d had a vasectomy not long after finding out about her pregnancy, but she also knows what his undercover work sometimes entails and she bows away from him.</p><p>“Condom,” she reminds him, and he backs away. Hasim reaches into the drawer and passes a foil square over her to Declan. It’s the first time they’ve directly interacted since shaking hands, most of their attention having been on Amanda. She marvels at her own attractions, at how different the two men are in just about every conceivable way, and probably also in ways she hasn’t thought of, but here they are, both utterly focused on bringing her pleasure and drawing their own pleasure as a result.</p><p>Now wrapped, Declan’s cock returns to prod at her thigh, and she tilts her hips, allowing him to slip into her with ease. He fills her, thicker than Hasim, and the stretch of it makes her back arch, her head falling down to Hasim’s chest.</p><p>“You good?” He whispers, and she nods, biting her lip.</p><p>“Mhm,” she confirms, and she looks over her shoulder, peering up at Declan. “I’m good,” she repeats.</p><p>He starts to move slowly, building his long steady thrusts into a rhythm until he is flush against her with every stroke, his balls slapping against her upper thighs. She can tell by the stutter of his hips that he’s already close, had probably had a tight grip at the base of his cock while watching her ride Hasim, and she is ready for him to let go.</p><p>She pushes back against him and deepens the arch of her body, opening herself up for him to slide deeper.</p><p>“Do it,” she says, her voice coming out in panting gasps. “Fuck me, baby, fill me up.” He grunts and speeds up, and just when she can feel him on the precipice she cries out, “Declan, please!” and he freezes, his cock jerking deep inside her as he comes.</p><p>As he pulls out of her she finally lets herself slump down, blanketing Hasim. He lets out an “oof” and laughs, shifting so she can roll softly onto her back on the bed. Both men retreat for a moment to dispose of their condoms, and as she waits for them to return her hand idly strokes down her pussy lips, and she shivers at how swollen and sensitized she is.</p><p>When they return, Hasim slips into his boxers but remains otherwise undressed, while Declan pulls his clothes back on. Amanda is half under the covers now, ready for bed, but she watches him through heavily-lidded eyes.</p><p>“How long are you back for?” She asks, and Declan’s shoulders tense up.</p><p>“A couple of months, probably.” He says. “I’ve got time owed me, I thought I might see about getting a sublet around here, maybe spend a bit more time with Jesse, take her to some games. Wouldn’t mind getting to know Billie, too.”</p><p>Neither of them say what they are both thinking, a couple of months is just long enough for Jesse to get used to his face before he disappears again. She just nods sleepily. They can figure it out tomorrow.</p><p>“I’ll let myself out,” he says softly. “I’ll call you.”</p><p>He leans down and kisses her tenderly on the forehead, nods amiably to Hasim, then walks out of the bedroom. A few minutes later, they hear the front door shut as he leaves.</p><p>“So,” Hasim says. “That just happened.”</p><p>Amanda laughs abruptly. “That’s kind of the story of my life with him.” She looks up at him. “It’s not like that with you.” She says quietly.</p><p>He shakes his head as he gets under the covers and arranges them so her head is on his chest, her hair tickling at his face.</p><p>“No,” he says. “I think he and I seek out very different things in life.”</p><p>“Except me?” She asks, looking up at him. His dark eyes consider her.</p><p>“No,” he says again. “I think even there, we differ. I don’t want to be something that just happens to you.”</p><p>She cuddles up against him, her arm wrapped around his stomach. “You’re still here, aren’t you?”</p><p>“Yeah,” he agrees. “I’m still here, sweetheart.”</p>
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